I'm thrilled to be 20 lbs of pure lard lighter. 5.6% lost my first go around at Paleo. Not bad right?
Two weeks ago several co-workers even remarked on noticeable weight loss. That felt great. Last week I started noticing more definition in my arms and was consistently using a new notch on my belt. Again, felt great.
I should be thrilled. But I'm not.
Why? Because I've been stuck at this weight for the last two weeks. Up a few pounds, down a few pounds, up again. I've been burning up grey matter trying to figure out what in the world I've been doing wrong. I've only had one cheat meal for crying out loud. Was it my not eating enough last week? Didn't have an appetite as I was sick and missed a few workouts. Was it my apple almost every day that I started adding into the rotation? Was it the fish oil I started taking or the colostrum that helps me fight off colds, but has a little soy in it? How have I been screwing this thing up? (Can you smell the smoke from my brain?)
Thankfully had a little chat with Sheena today as I was hitting the rower and determined to move some heavy stuff (you're a life saver woman!). Maybe my body is trying to figure out what the heck I'm doing and if it can survive on this stuff. Maybe I have more cortisol running through my body as I've had a few nights of little to no sleep due to hacking up a lung or two. Maybe it's the stress of trying to make some wise decisions lately.
Bottom line: I like how I feel when I eat Paleo. I like cooking this way. I like this life-style. So even if the next 20lbs don't melt away like the first, I need to keep going. My body will just have to adjust to my will on this one.
I read a great quote this week from a guy I really respect (and share a birthday with): "Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will" (Mahatma Gandhi). I haven't reached my goal of cleaning and jerking 125 lbs yet. I still can't do a pull-up. I still need much work on my snatch ... but I'm focusing on what's ahead, and tackling whatever gets thrown at me in the WODs and OLY as best as I possibly can. I trust that this will bring progress, just as I trust eating Paleo is more beneficial than any other way I've eaten over the last few years. (As a side note, a friend doing Weight Watchers just told me that they changed their point system and made it much more beneficial to eat the way that I'm eating. Maybe they are catching on?)
So where does that leave me? Tonight I'm having a cheat meal. In fact, I'm just not gonna care what I put into my body today. Then I'm back on it, because I
want to be back on it. For the holiday's I'm going to let my standards be a little looser and not be so strict at every meal. Not planning on going over board, but if a homemade desert is offered me ... I'm giving myself permission to enjoy it. But only if I
really want it. If someone offers me something I don't think is worth it ... well, then it's on a different spectrum on the F*** Off scale, and I'm going to remain steady in refusing to be guilted into eating these deadly foods (http://whole9life.com/2010/12/the-healthy-f-off-scale-version-2-0/).
There is one more anchor I'm choosing to hold on to: "So let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up" (Gal 6:9). This principle of sowing and reaping is one I've seen proven again and again my life and many others'. Living on a farm for a few years I became intimately acquainted with the fact that you don't sow and reap in the same season. Instant gratification rarely is worth it. This is one more reason to keep on keeping on. The harvest will come ... one day, I'll hit those goals. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but surely faster than if I went back to eating crap.
PS: I debated posting some pics, but don't want to cause anyone to hurl. I will say that the side shots actually do show how much belly fat I've lost ... and that makes me excited!